To One Andy Ross

I simply want to start out by saying, thank you so much for being a dude. I wanted a boy so badly and I'm glad my wish came true. 

Who am I? In case you're wondering. 

Well, I'm someone who will play a rather significant role in your life. That guy who appears to know what he's doing when it comes to parenting but it is clear he doesn't. I'm that guy who will sit down and play a boardgame with you, teach you how to play and how to become the man I can only hope to be.

I'm that guy who'll always support you and be in your corner throughout your life. I will support you in whatever you choose to study and pursue as a career.

I am your dad.

I haven't met you and I love you and all that you are. We haven't met and yet I've held you as close as I can. Even though our eyes haven't locked, you have me wrapped around your little fingers.

When I think about you, I can't help but feel overwhelmed. There's so much to teach you and so much for us to do together, but no way of knowing if there are enough days to experience it all.

I don't know what to expect upon your birth, except that everything will change. And things have definitely changed, but I can confidently say we are 100% prepared for your arrival.  I hope you are ready for an amazing life because I know we have some big plans for you. So buckle up! It's going to be a fun ride 

In the years to come, I will teach you so much, but you have already taught me infinite amounts. You have taught me what it is to be a father. You have taught me to be selfless. You have taught me pure love.

I hope to teach you to be a good man, to make friends and to love them with all of your heart; to be kind to the people around you and help them when they're having a difficult time. We only get one chance to get life right and we are prone to making mistakes, but the mistakes become manageable when we are kind to one another.

I'm excited to teach you to read, to write, to play chess, to cook, to ride a bike. I want to see you grow and develop your own sense of humor, to see what things spark your interest and passion. 

In all honesty, I know you're going to be perfect. I'll take what my parents taught me, learn from their mistakes, learn from my mistakes and do all that I can to raise you. But do me a favor, we know you are going to grow up so fast, so just try to slow it down for us. You're our first child. So remember,  everything you do is a first for us. We want to soak in as much of it as we can.

 

Be prepared for lots of photos to be taken of you. This is typically how we 'soak things in.' We lock in each of those memories with a photo. So just be prepared.  Also, don't be upset when we need you to model for us for a few hours.

My life has been far from perfect. I've endured a lot of pain, sadness, loss and disappointment. I know I cant always shield you from experiencing these emotions, but I will do everything in my power to protect you from harm, all the while trying to give you the happiest childhood ever. They say fathering is not something perfect men do, but something that perfects a man. I know I'll be a better man for having met you and will love you for the rest of my days. Any time you feel as if I am not doing good, talk to me. I want us to be best of friends, make me a better father, each and every day.

We won't be the perfect parents, but we will do our best to help you make your way through the difficult growing up years and prepare for the future.

I pray you experience true love and friendship. And peradventure during the course of  your sojourning you found love, choose wisely, for all bright and beautiful ain't exact way they look. Our world is a mirage. And when you meet the one who will steal you away from us, I hope you'll safeguard your heart. Don't let your emotions get the best of you. If someone breaks your heart - as people often do - I hope you'll know the pain won't last.

See son, don't be wary during adversities, for the earth is a pendulum, to and fro it goes, it waddles and toddles. All you've got is believe in yourself. I want you to be fearless and true to yourself. I don't ever want you to feel insecure.

I'll let you in on a little secret. The secret to a happy life is accepting you for who you are and believing you are the best. Never compare yourself to anyone, never live beyond your means. Compete only against yourself.

If you forget everything I've said, remember this: unless it's necessary, don't take debts. Debts can derail your growth, debts from friends can make you look mediocre, loans that you take but fail to utilize to get better can occasion more losses to you. If you can, avoid debts. If at all possible, unless you're in the business of lending money, avoid lending people money unless it's absolutely necessary. That's how friendships perish.

I have seen a lot of things but I expect you to see a lot more than me in your life, go to places I haven't gone to, meet people I have never dreamt of meeting.

The future is uncertain and never turns out in exactly the way you expect, but we will figure it out together as we go. And tomorrow when you see me no more and you're left to man your world alone, don't fret my son, that's how it should be.