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Are We Meant To Be?

"Can we meet today?" He said after she answered his call. No pleasantries, just straight to the point. A straight shooter this one.

"I have exams." She said with finality. Lately it felt like they were just making excuses to not see each other.

"The weather confuses me as do you. The way it's clear one moment then clouded the next. I can hear the pain in your voice coming from the hurt in your heart and I would really love to fix it, I just don't know where to start."

"You could start by not leaving." She said. Not out loud. "Is hiding running away! I know I'm being unfair and I'm sorry, but there are just too many doubts, too many fears and you care about me, you love me and want to spend the rest of your life with me, yet the only answer I can give is, I don't know."

After three years of being together, he had finally asked for her hand in marriage. Her first love. How could she have said no! Then boom! He dropped the news. He would be leaving to some foreign land to further his studies.  In that moment she felt that distance is heavy, hard and real. She didn't know that heartstrings tied and tangled up so much inside, until those words struck home.

Three months. Three months was all she had to prepare for a wedding. Her wedding. After which she'd probably never see her love again for the next five years.

"I'll leave behind a seed. Just to remind you that wherever I'd be, miles long and far away, my love for you would never subside." He had tried to soothe her into the idea of him leaving her with a child. A child that would be used to send away luring men and preserve her for him until when he came back.

At twenty two years of age and a third year student, the thought of bearing a child hadn't exactly crossed her mind. Yes, she loved and adored the little beings. But having to bear one. To her, this was still early. All these drove her into thinking that he only proposed because he was scared, maybe did not trust her enough, that him leaving would make her forget about him and move on to another. And he was right. When he said he had to go, she knew she would never make it through.

Emotions had ran through her head. She would be left alone. Crying, sometimes with excruciating pain. Feeling helpless and all alone. Imagine only getting to talk to him on the phone.

"My heart will continue strong and true, steadfast in my love for you. You never need to fret or fear, my only love is for you my dear. It'll hurt to be so far from you, but a love like ours will make it through." She had tried to warm his heart. Maybe even, tried to convince herself.

Will she forget his face? Will she forget his sweet embrace? Will she forget how she felt with him? His thoughts a trail of uncertainty.

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